Today Is the Day!

Today is the day that I have been dreaming about for 7 years since my son was diagnosed with a peanut allergy. Today we go into hospital where his allergist will slowly and carefully feed him peanut butter. If he passes this "oral challenge", our lives will change forever.

I just bought Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups as per the doctor’s instructions. It’s the first time I’ve bought them in 7 long years. Apparently many peanut-allergic children don't like the taste of peanut butter so it can be hard to distinguish distaste from an allergic reaction. Hence the Peanut Butter Cups (what's not to like about chocolate and peanut butter?).

L is thrilled at the prospect of never having to wear his Epipen again, taking off his MedicAlert bracelet and just eating whatever he wants. I’m excited to possibly buy peanut butter again, to grocery shop without reading every single label and to send him to play-dates and sleepovers without worry. I'm sure that friends and family are looking forward to preparing and serving food without fear of causing an adverse reaction.

I’m also a bit terrified. What if he has a reaction in the hospital? He’s (thankfully) never had full-blown anaphylaxis and I don’t want to see it. I tell myself that he will be in hospital and closely watched with all modern medical technology at hand. I’m thankful that my husband will be there with me so I’m not having to put on a brave face by myself.

Please keep all fingers and toes crossed and pray to your divine connections. I’ll keep you posted...

Image Copyright © 2012 Dysprosia

Living With(out?) a Peanut Allergy

When L was barely 2 years old, he ate peanut butter toast for about the fiftieth time and developed hives around his mouth. A few months later he ran to me from across the room at a New Year’s Eve party, his mouth and tongue swelling after eating a snack-sized Crispy Crunch bar. His pediatrician referred us to an allergist who confirmed our worst fear: a peanut allergy, potentially anaphylactic.

Our lives were turned upside-down. We bought Epipens (at $100 a piece- thank goodness for drug plans). We educated ourselves and learned how to read labels carefully. We ordered a Medic-Alert bracelet for him to wear everyday. We constantly made decisions about what was or was not safe for our little guy to eat. Dinners at restaurants became fraught with potential danger from cross-contamination and we learned how to speak to servers and managers about it. Traveling outside of North America became too great a risk for us to take. Just flying in an airplane gave us reason to worry.

I had to learn how to bake when I realized that most birthday cakes made at bakeries could not be guaranteed nut-free. I figured out the allergen-labeling policy of major manufacturers. Did you know that Canada does not yet have a law requiring companies to label for potential allergens? (It comes into effect in August, 2012). Did you know, for example, that Loblaw does not have a policy about labeling potential allergens in their products? I had to learn to call the 1-800 numbers for these companies and asking if specific products may contain any traces of peanuts.

When L started school, we had to figure out how the school was going to keep him safe. Thankfully, the teachers and administration have always been supportive and the Toronto District School Board has an anaphylaxis policy. L learned to wear his Epipen when he started JK and we have Epipens stored in the classroom and school office as well as in my purse. 

L has been very good about his allergy. He grumbles from time to time about wearing his Epipen but asks questions about the food he is offered and has no problem refusing something he isn’t sure about. That’s not bad considering much of what he has to refuse is candy or a baked treat!

We have negotiated play-dates and sleepover camps and birthday parties. I am eternally grateful to parents who aren’t intimidated or put out by his allergy, who ask the appropriate questions and take the necessary precautions. Just knowing that you care so much about his safety makes me want to hug you.

When L was 6 years old, he was retested. He was so hopeful. I could see the dismay on his face as the hive developed on his arm where the peanut serum was placed. I reminded him that nothing would change and to stay positive. His peanut allergy had remained but he had not developed any new allergies nor had he had any accidental exposure. His chances of outgrowing the peanut allergy were between 20% and 50% as a result. We were instructed to come back in 3 years time.

This afternoon, we visited the allergist again. My big boy (almost 9 years old) didn’t have to sit on my lap this time nor did I have to hold his arm down and instruct him not to scratch. She tested both saline and a histamine as well as peanut serum. And the peanut serum did not react! She placed actual peanut butter on his arm and did another skin test....and nothing. Now he has a requisition for a blood test and if that is negative, they will conduct an oral challenge in a hospital setting, feeding him actual peanut butter (likely this summer).

It all seems a bit surreal. We’ve learned to just live our lives around this allergy. It is our day-to-day reality. To think that in a few months there is a decent chance that we can eat out without worry, go to an ice-cream parlour, buy goods at a bakery or even eat peanut butter in our own house... I could cry with the relief over the thought of it. I’ll try not to get too excited and hopeful lest L sense it and become potentially disappointed. But I have all of my fingers and toes crossed!

Many thanks to organizations such as Anaphylaxis Canada, Medic-Alert, the Toronto Anaphylaxis Education Group and publications such as Allergic Living.You have made our lives easier by giving us the information we need.

Image © Martin Maun | Dreamstime.com

Happy Halloween? Bah humbug!

I have a deep dark secret to share...


I don't love Halloween.


When I was a kid, Halloween was almost my most favourite time of year. I planned my costumes months in advance and my mother, saint that she is, dutifully handmade each of our costumes (all four of us) year after year. Some of my past favourites were Scarlett O’Hara (during my Gone with the Wind obsession, winning top costume at school) and my sister’s outstanding chicken costume, complete with individual “feathers” hand-sewn on all over it and yellow stockings.

As a young adult, Halloween still held that fascination for me. I looked forward to crazy Halloween parties and late night screenings of the Rocky Horror Picture Show at our local cinema, pieces of toast ready for the tossing. Now that I have kids of my own you would think I’d be psyched for this pagan-turned-commercial holiday.

I face Halloween with dread every year. I’m no Martha Stewart and it seems as though the “sewing gene” was not passed down to me from my mother. I always feel like I'm letting my kids down. I will put up the meager decorations (this year: a Halloween wreath, skull LED lights, “spider webs” around the front porch) but my heart is never in it. Perhaps it’s that the holiday has become too commercialized. It’s Christmas on crack. Our society has gone over the top with the decorations and costumes. No longer can a kid go out in his father’s old jacket and tie and pencilled-on stubble. One has to truck over to the local fly-by-night Halloween superstore to drop a bundle on tacky, flimsy and overpriced “flavour of the year” costumes. One jack-o-lantern with triangle eyes isn’t going to cut it in my ‘hood. You have to have a minimum of three creatively carved spectacles. Each house tries to outdo the next and the decorations are often quite frightening to the younger trick-or-treaters (I’ve had to carry more than one of my kids up to doors for candy because they were terrified).

It could be that I’m feeling so down on Halloween this year because I’ve been sick for 3 weeks and don’t have the energy to fake it anymore. I also have one kid home sick from school today of all days. Which reminds me of a Halloween two years ago when my son came down with H1N1 the day before trick-or-treating. Thankfully he had picked out a surgeon costume weeks in advance. Grabbing a surgical mask from the emergency room that morning, he was good to go, nary a germ being spread to friends and neighbours.

Perhaps another reason for my negativity is that my next-door-neighbour and dear dear friend, Allison of Radishes & Rhubarb, moved to Hamilton in the summer. As much as I dread Halloween, if I had her in the trenches with me- glass of wine in hand- it was nearly enjoyable. We always planned to share a family meal with my three and her two little ones before we rounded them up for the obligatory neighbourhood candy-crawl. It’s just not the same without her.

So I’ll suck it up and the kids will get out there tonight, filling their bags with cavity-causing candy (from which I will have to carefully remove anything not clearly marked “peanut-free”). And on Saturday, as is our tradition, all candy will be dumped onto the kitchen table and the kids will be instructed to eat as much as they can (the remainder going to my husband’s workplace or to my 20 year old niece). After about twenty minutes, they will stop, declaring Halloween over for another year (thank goodness!). Maybe next year with a little more planning and energy, I’ll get into the spirit.


p.s. I do love Christmas!! Apparently there are 55 sleeps until Christmas Eve...

Image: © Darryl Brooks | Dreamstime.com